Thursday, April 24, 2008

A Question of Etiquette: Do I Give You the Ass or the Crotch?

In Fight Club, the narrator speaks of "single-serving friends," people that one meets in a situation where all food is served for a single person (usually in some sort of shrink wrap), such as on a plane, a train, or in a hospital.

Please describe (preferably in an artistic manner) the most memorable single-serving buddy you've encountered.

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Hannah's avatar - Go to profile

Hannah 48p · 885 weeks ago

I was riding the Fung Wah back from NYC and I almost always wait to board the bus last when I ride alone so I can choose my seatmate (the notion of getting one's own seat is really just a fantasy...). This time, however, I decided to board early and let fate decide who would sit with me. Well, Fate was kind and I did get my own seat for that ride, but in front of me was a very attractive man my age. For the hours on the bus I would glance over his shoulder and see what he was reading, he would glance back and we exchanged some smiles.

The single serving came as we were getting off the bus in Boston (These were the days when you were let off at the curb in Chinatown.) and we exchanged words while claiming our bags. We ended up walking to the T together and riding as far as Park St. In that time I found out he was a grad student at Harvard studying politics, smart, funny and gorgeous. Single serving buddies are the hardest kind to have because as you part you wonder how you can make them a real meal (follow the analogy, I'm not being gross.). I took a chance and asked for his number. He gave it to me.

I called. He never called back. The End.
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Kennedy School Grad · 885 weeks ago

I was once on a bus back to school and as I was sitting there minding my own business, I noticed this girl reading my journal over my shoulder. We played an awkward game of peek-a-boo through most of the ride and then when we got off the bus, she asked for my number. I gave it to her, sort of. I didn't know what to do, so I sort of panicked and might have accidentally given her an incorrect last digit. I don't think she ever caught on that I'm not really into girls. Plus, she had this enormous booger hanging out of her nose.
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mb · 885 weeks ago

* I met a girl on acid right before Halloween. She was beautiful and couldn't stop talking -- more fascinating and curious than annoying. It was like she was discovering everything and all pistons were firing. She kissed me, then stripped out of her summer dress and ran around the house naked (her house, by the way, was transformed into a giant fort with furniture up-ended and blankets covering anything below 4'). I miss her.

* Two Austrians traveling to Amsterdam from Venice with me shared their wine, cigarettes and stories. Like brothers, they beat the shit out of each other too. One was big and the other small, so this made me nervous at times. But they were hilarious. They were the ones who advised me to distribute my money to several pockets in case I got robbed (I took their advice and was certainly mugged two days later).

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